they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
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