Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
Thank God I didn't lose my virginity to that asshole. That woulda been like winnin a raffle ticket for a free bag of dog shit. But with like a really pretty bag. A pretty bag full of dog shit.
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
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