Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
Randomize
