he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
I'm at the gym. I've taken enough caffeine to feel inspired to be a low budget instagram fitness model. I totally forgot my push up bra though
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
Randomize