the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
He followed me on twitter after I posted a drunk screen shot of a tweet. It's like he gave me permission to stalk him on a whole different level.
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
Randomize
