Can Purell be used as lube?
I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
You could sing the national anthem right before we have sex. Make it feel like a sporting event
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
Randomize
