after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
why is my underwear the only thing i was wearing that smells like vodka?
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
Randomize
