OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
How did our waiter from olive garden end up passed out drunk in my roommate's bed?
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
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