i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
Enjoy the penises
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
Randomize
