the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
But break dance skills will only take you so far
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
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