Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
The sun is out, the birds are chirping, I made some brownies, I'm not pregnant
This is literally what my 13-year old cousin said to me this morning.
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
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