Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
i really wanted you to get laid last night and i didnt think you were going to. so i posted porn on your facebook.it made sense at 3am
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
Yelling at the starbucks lady to write Beyoncé on my cup
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
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