I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
Ryan Reynolds is on sesame street right now. Dressed as a letter A but still sexy as fuck. PBS is so considerate of the stay at home mom.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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