She said her name was "party"
He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
Naked Twister starts at high noon
Note to self: don't tell your girlfriends dad you can have his daughter in bed by ten and home by midnight. He doesnt find it funny
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
He keeps bees of course he's weird
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
I tried saying sorry but instead I puked down her shirt and tried to clean it up... Now I have a bruise on my forehead. good news, before she left she wrote her number on my stomach with sharpie
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