No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
I'm glad the dog doesn't judge me for doing leftover lines and watching George of the Jungle at 10 am
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
How does it feel to date your dad?
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
