He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
He came home all fucked up crying slammed his bedroom door and all we could hear for about three hours was THIS ISN'T GONA RUIN MYLIFe what happend
I told him I got this chick pregnant and he has to get a new wingman
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
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