How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
I feel compelled to tell you that I woke up this morning and found an entire corn on the cob in my purse. Ive decided not to question my drunken behavior anymore, and to just accept it as my lifestyle.
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize
