You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
i think i just lost a toe
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
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