im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
He wrote on the bartenders notepad "phone?" So I wrote back "911"
Sorry I threw up all over your Lyft.
It's ok I woke up next to a dumpster.
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
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