There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
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