You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
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