so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
I'm sober. Being kissed by a chick with a llama puppet. Shoot me now.
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
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