people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
Dude, I'm importing a boy from Oklahoma for my divorce party. It's like doctors without borders, but with dicks.
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
Do you remember whose house we're in?
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
Randomize
