I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Randomize
