Last night was an abortion. I might need a publicist.
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
New low: eating a buttered roll while taking a shit.
This is why we're soulmates.
I need a hoe opinion
go on
Randomize
