It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
Randomize