coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
Remind me to tell you the one about the cashier that wouldn't sell me Jim Beam and NyQuil.
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
So i realized that if i bought everything from my google search history for the past week i would have a dolphin, a wolf costume, a unicorn costume, a katana and a bullet proof vest. Not sure how the dolphin would fit in but the rest of it would end up in one awesome night or someone would die. Either way i say we do it.
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
Randomize
