'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
Drinking heavily at 3pm and about to rescue a 30lb street turtle. Dont even bother attempting to rise to this level bitch
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
Randomize
