bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
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