is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
My financial advisor pointed out that 37% of my income is currently going towards "non-essential food items"
That's banker lingo for "you're an alcoholic"
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
Randomize
