Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
I tried to pay my bar tab with my gym membership card. Twice.
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
Randomize
