I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
I was cleaning up my drunken mess and I found my ID in a cereal box
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
Randomize
