If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
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