Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
Randomize