In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
we were just talking about designated drivers and i suggested we each hire a mexican day laborer to give us piggy back rides... i have the best ideas eveeer
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
you told the bartender not to open the bottle because you were gonna put it in your purse in case you get cut off later
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
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