This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
Randomize
