I'd rather drink alone in my closet than hang out with that girl
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
Randomize
