SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
You convinced her to break up with her boyfriend, made out with her all night, got her to buy us all shots then went home with a different girl...
That explains the "i hate you" text. But the facebook deletion is a bit harsh
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
Randomize
