What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
you kept yelling 'bird cage' in between songs and finally the lead singer stopped to ask if you meant 'free bird' and you said 'fuck you, i'm not gay', needless to say you were kindly escorted out
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
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