She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
Just figured out I can wedge my iphone between my boobs so it stands up at a perfect handsfree reading angle. Clearly somebody up there wants me to smoke this bowl while I watch my bieber videos
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
A man bought two 40's from me, then asked if I had duct tape. How do people over 50 know about Edward 40hands? It was very weird.
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
I'm eating Doritos at 9am because last nights weed is just now starting to wear off
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
