I think the neighbors upstairs are trying for more kids. I want to run up there and yell "mazal tov!"
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
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