His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
i would one night stand the shit outta him
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
He said I was really mad at him on Friday. Dude I fell asleep in all my clothes and shoes, with my flashlight on, on my phone... I could have been mad at the wall. It wasn't my classiest day.
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
Randomize
