I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
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