We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
Man I gotta stop stashing shit when I'm high. I just spent 2 hours searching for my bag of pot and eventually found it in fucking a bandaid box.
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
Randomize
