i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
In a tragic sexting typo, I typed the word "blobjob". Now she's coming over and I have no idea what I'm in for...
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
What a dumb baby whore.
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
You couldn’t remember the word hand jibber. Instead, your drunk ass offered the bartenders “unlimited hand fritters” if they wouldn’t cut you off.
Randomize
