YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
Life lesson: when driving and throwing up, choose a paper bag over plastic. Fuck my life.
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
Randomize
