she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
found a ham sandwich in the elevator it tasted so hungry and it was still fresh. dont be mad at me. you know you love ham.
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
Randomize
