piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
The only thing stopping me from having sex with you in my parents jacuzzi bathtub is the knowledge that they've already had that idea themselves
I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night.
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
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