why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
We don't have paper towels so I microwaved a spinach/egg sandwich thingy wrapped in toilet paper. Toilet paper. so that's how my day started.
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
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