it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
omg this kid i'm babysitting is making a penis out of playdough ahhhh.
He just rolled me a 'baby penis' as opposed to his 'big boy' penis that he crafted...he just demanded that I roll him a penis.
I just saw a guy give a mop to his fat wife and say "Look, an exercise stick!"
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
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